In ten days I’ll be 15 + 1 years old! Too bad I’ll be celebrating it on a school day so there’s not much time to explore in some other place after classes. Now speaking of the Intrams, it was fine. The first day was horrible, second day was fun, and third day was decent. I don’t have anything to share much about that event. I played chess….and I think you already know what happened.
Right now, I am crying. Seriously. With what I’m reading over the Internet, it made my tears roll down my cheeks. I am not reading some article about dead people.
I’m reading how God always knew our insecurities.
I read that the only way to overcome your insecurities is to pray to Him. If you say your inner thoughts to God, here is what He’ll say to you:
“Trust in me.
"I am unfathomable, faithful from the first to the last. My love for you is so wide, so deep, so all-encompassing that you cannot imagine. I reach out to you with all my heart. I love you, my child.
"Whatever you do, however bad you feel, even if you shun me and turn your back on me, I will always love you. Even if you have done the most dreadful things, I still love you. I am the way, the truth and the life. I am the love that you seek. The love to heal your wounds, to bind up your inner hurts.
"Be encouraged - you are not alone. I am always with you. I knew you before you were born, when you were formed in your mother’s womb. I know every step of your life, every minute, every second.
"Turn to me and I will comfort you. You cannot hide from me like you hide from other people. I see into your heart, and I understand. I know about your insecurity. Do not worry that I know this; be reassured, because I love you and want the best for you. I am here.
"I will not harm you - I came to set you free, free in your heart, free in your spirit. I yearn to bring you into my Kingdom, into my peace. Turn to me, let me in, and I will begin to heal you. There is no outer shell that you can wear that I cannot love through. Be at peace. Do not be afraid. I love you. I AM.”
I cried while I was reading this. I always try to feel good about myself but some people would mercilessly put me down. Lots of times I wish I was in the shoes of some pretty and well-liked classmate whom everyone envied. Other times I wish I was the girlfriend of some hot guy whom all the girls fell in love with because everyone will think I’m lucky. I was hoping 2010 will be a better year for my career and romance.
I am not allowed to have a boyfriend yet since I need to prioritize my education. I know this sounds KJ to all of you but I guess I’ll be lucky in the long run. I and my dad discussed about lovelife during our most recent chat. He told me lots of things like don’t hurry in entering a relationship. If my crush doesn’t like me, it means there’s someone more deserving who’ll enter your doorstep. Another one: having no suitor or boyfriend doesn’t mean you’re ugly.
It bothered me the whole time. I’m sick of people bragging about their boyfriends and monthsaries. It only made me jealous of couples and making me wish more that I have my own guy. There are times when I pray to God and tell Him to give me a boyfriend who’ll make me happy. However, I’m turning 16 (my hatest number, but it’s a confidential story) in 10 days and I’m still single. I hate it when I see friends’ “In A Relationship With xxxxx” status in Facebook because it only made me well, insecure. That’s why I read about that article.
I always ask to myself, “How come all the hot people are taken?” because it seems all the gorgeous guys aren’t available. I sound bitter, right? It sucks to know that it seems like all the cute guys in the world are taken by drop-dead gorgeous girls. I guess some of you won’t agree with this. But as far it goes, it is better to enjoy being single. You can like anyone you want. You can hang out with your pals 24/7. And most of all, you can have a very successful career. Then the lovelife will come as the right man arrives and you live happily ever after.
My question: do you know any pretty girl or handsome guy who’s single?
