Date: March 14, 2009. Time: 7:15 PM.
Hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin ako maka-get over sa last day kahapon. Happy nga ako dahil last day na nga ng exams, pero there’s one thing I’m not happy about.
Last day as II-2.
Ayoko nga mangyari ito, pero kailangan talaga dahil block section kayo for two years. Two years on 52 great classmates? Hindi na nga enough sa akin iyon, except kung ayoko talaga sa mga kaklase ko. Mas okay nga kung kasama ko ang buong II-2 sa Third and Fourth Year pero hindi talaga puwede. So far, these has been the best 2 years of my life kahit marami akong regrets noong una. Why?
Noong enrollment para sa First Year, I was disappointed not be classmates with majority of my barkada noong Grade 6. But there was one thing I was wishing while I read the enrollment list for I-2: Let this be the section where I’ll be happy. Kinakabahan ako noong first day of classes dahil buhat ko ay isang malaking bag and in an entirely new class. Mainit pa panahon noon. Muntik na ako ma-late sa Rite of Passage kung saan lalagyan na kami ng necktie. Then pagkatapos noon, bumilis ang mga pangyayari.
Unti-unti kong nakilala ang lahat ng I-2. They’re super nice, friendly, cheerful. Over the next months hanggang sa very last day, they slowly learned to forget the old, nerdy Candice they’ve seen in Grade School. In fact dahil sa kanilang lahat, I changed my KJ personality (read: walang alam na activities kundi magbasa lang) and learned how to be a cool person. However, there are times talaga nang ikukumpara ko ang II-2 sa klase na ayaw ko talagang makasama ulit: 6-6. And no, I won’t mention names. No offense sa mga makakabasa nitong part na ito.
Sa 6-6, maraming plastik. Kaya ko sabihin kung sinu-sino pero sabi ko nga I won’t mention names. Nagkakalat pa sila ng something bad about me pero hindi naman totoo. Lagi sila ang topic ko kapag nagkukuwento ako sa aking mga friends. Nag-checheer sila kapag nag-pepresent ako…..but in reality, they’re faking the cheers. Once a former classmate said something during our Greek Mythology Paegant: “Candice, alam mo ba na kapag nag-rerecite ka nag-nenerdy look sila sa likod mo?” Abaaa. Noong Grade 5 naman ako, may isang ex-classmate na pupurihin ako na maganda daw ako, mabango daw ako, etc. I believed in her…until I found out from another friend na kabaliktaran lang lahat pala iyon. A “personal” rumor spread across the class also on that year that made 90% of the class turn on me. Ito pa iyong masaklap: pinangangadirian nila ako for no reason. Ilang beses sinabi ng mga friends ko na ako daw pinakaayaw sa klase. Ewan ko ba kung bakit. Hindi naman masama ugali ko. No one really appreciated who I am.
Ang II-2 naman, kabaliktaran ng lahat na ito. I spent the happiest times with this class. Everytime I did something heroic or mag-pepresent ako, chini-cheer nila ako, walang pambobola. I thank them for their every cheer. Sobra silang encouraging sila kapag ako'y mag-vovolleyball. Sa two years na nakasama ko sila, wala pang rumor na kumalat. Wala din nagsabi ng something negative. Never ko naging kalaban ang buong klase. I learned to get along before everything’s over. If others thought of me just as weird and nerdy, II-2 thought the opposite. They helped me to prove everyone that I’ve changed and I’m no longer Candice the hated student. Dahil sa kanila, na-feel ko ang importance ko sa klase. No rejections. Everyone is accepted.
Pagbalik namin sa classroom pagkatapos ng Turn-over Ceremony, gusto ko sanang mag-speech sa buong II-2 pero kaunti na lang iyong time. Sobra talaga iyong iyakan. Kung nagkaroon ako ng chance na mag-speech kahapon, sasabihin ko na lahat. I will thank them for the happiness they brought in my life. Yesterday was probably the most emotional day of my life so far. Doon ko nalaman iyong reason bakit linagay ako ni God sa section na ayaw ko noong Grade 5 and 6. There is a better plan pala. God will give me 52 girls in my batch who will love me so much. II-2 supported me in every obstacle I took, including my injury during the outbound. We were united when we were victorious, we were united when we experience our conflicts. Noong binasa ko ang mga dedications ng II-2 sa pinasa kong folder kahapon, I was overwhelmed to read such loving messages. I never received any dedications of that kind. Thanks for those who wrote these notes.
Sa totoo lang, ayoko nang mag-reshuffle. I’m scared. But I guess it’s an opportunity to erase all judgments. Like what happened over the past two years. Ito na lang ang message ko sa II-2:
Thank you for bringing me happiness throughout these two years. Sobra ko talagang na-appreciate iyon. Sorry kung naging masama man ako sa inyo. Best wishes sa inyong lahat; huwag sana kayong magbago for the worse. Always remember na nandito ako kapag may problema ako. Smile always!!! :DD
